Dear Hyapatia,
I'm in love with a girl who is born-again celibate. She doesn't want to have sex until she’s married. She’s not a virgin, but has decided not to have sex again until her wedding night. I never saw myself as a religious person or one who could wait until their wedding for sex, but she’s a very special girl. My question is am I silly for feeling this way? Should I wait for her?
John

Dear John,
I can't tell you what’s best for you, but if you love this woman and you really want to be with her for the rest of your life, why not? There’s nothing wrong with abstaining until marriage. Waiting for something makes it all that much more special. If you two do get married, I expect there will be fireworks that night!

Dear Hyapatia,
My boyfriend has this thing for anal sex. I’ve done it several times with him and each time I keep thinking that ought to satisfy him for a while, but he wants to do it again the next time we have sex! I don't know whether to tell him I don't want to do it any more or what. I don't really enjoy it and only do it to make him happy. But it doesn't make him happy for very long. Suggestions?
Julie

Dear Julie,
If you don't like anal sex, you shouldn't do it. It was very nice of you to try it for your boyfriend, but if he doesn't realize how you feel – and it seems he doesn't – I would stop doing it. By the way, I have to wonder about a straight guy who prefers anal sex. Most men prefer regular, natural vaginal sex. If this is something he’s always after, I would wonder if he’s being honest with himself about who he prefers to have sex with.

Dear Hyapatia,
My girlfriend comes from a rich family. She’s used to having anything she wants. I don't make that much money, but I try my best to give her nice things. Still, I feel like no matter how much I make or how hard I work, it will never be enough. I wish I could win the lottery so she could see me as an equal. The only thing I know that I can do to make good money is grow weed. I grow some ass-kickin' weed and it helps get us those things we couldn't afford any other way. She's cool with that, but we both wish we lived in a state where it was legal. That’s why I want to move to Colorado. She’s torn because her family is here and she doesn't want to leave them. Do you think it would be worth it for us to move?
Andrew

Dear Andrew,
That’s a decision that’s best made by the two of you sitting down and having a good heart-to-heart. Keep in mind, traveling back home is probably not as hard or as expensive as you think. You can drive back any time or fly back with a little bit of planning. There’s nothing that compares to enjoying your favorite herb without the fear of being arrested or harassed for it. For me, it was a no-brainer. I’m so glad I moved. I’ve had no regrets and I’m now living surrounded by people who share my love of cannabis.

Dear Hyapatia,
My girlfriend smokes occasionally; I smoke all the time. It helps me deal with pain and keeps me in a good mood. When I feel the pain, I get grumpy, like most people do. So my girlfriend thinks I need pot to have sex. No, I need pot to keep me from pain and to stay a bad mood. No one wants to have sex when they’re in lots of pain. She doesn't seem to get that. I’ve had to hide smoking from her so I don't catch hell. I’ve tried to explain it to her, but she thinks I’m just making excuses. Should I keep hiding it from her to make my life easier?
Marc

Dear Marc,
Personally, I wouldn't hide it because I see nothing wrong with it. If your girlfriend has a problem with it, maybe she should stop and think about why so many states have medical marijuana laws. It really is a medicine. It really does help with pain and a host of other things. With a little more education, maybe she would understand. Show her examples of reputable people who endorse cannabis for medical reasons. Dr. Sanjay Gupta is a great start. I bet she’ll come around to sensible thinking eventually.