Dear Hyapatia,
I have several boyfriends. I like to keep my options open. I’m not ready to move in with someone or stay with one guy right now. Having sex has always been great fun for me and I come easy, but I like to masturbate better. I get off faster and harder. This didn't used to bother me so much, but now I don't even get off all the time unless I am high. I don't want to be like that. Should I stop masturbating?
Cheryl

Dear Cheryl,
No, don't stop masturbating. Orgasms release oxytocin from the brain that helps reduce stress and releases hormones that are good for every organ in the body. Think about what it is that turns you on the most when you masturbate. Bring that with you to bed with your boyfriend. Teach him to do what you do to get yourself off. If it’s a hand movement, like moving three fingers around in little circles on the clit with pressure, teach him how. It doesn't matter if you orgasm from the clitoris or the G-spot. If you can't get off during sex, but the clitoral stimulation makes you come, that's okay. We don't have to come from fucking each and every time. That's one of the many advantages of being a woman. Guys feel that it’s their responsibility to make sure their lady gets off, one way or another. Most are really open to learning new ways to turn you on, no matter what they are.

Hyapatia,
My girlfriend’s breasts are two different sizes. I’m worried about her. I’ve never noticed this with any other girls I’ve been with. Does this mean she could have breast cancer?
Jason

Dear Jason,
Most women have one breast that’s bigger than the other. Some women have a more pronounced difference. Breast cancer appears as more of a lump on the breast in one location, not the entire breast. There’s no reason to worry about the different size, as long it’s soft and feels like the other one. 

Dear Hyapatia,
I have a very embarrassing problem. Every now and then, like when I am under lots of stress, I have a very painful breakout. It’s on my pussy lip and my inner thigh. It’s always in the same place and only on one side. I’ve been to several doctors and they always do a culture to see if it is herpes, and then they tell me it’s not. Blisters form that itch, burn and hurt deeply all the time. Do you have any idea what this may be?
Michaella

Dear Michaella,
If the doctors have done cultures and they have come back negative for herpes, you can be certain it’s not herpes. Has anyone suggested shingles? If you've had the chicken pox, shingles are a possibility. When activated -- and stress is a common cause -- the chicken pox virus, which lies dormant in the ends of the nerves near the spine, can cause shingles. They usually show up around the trunk on one side of the body. But shingles can break out on the head, neck, genitals or thighs. The disease appears as a rash, with blisters, that itch. When scratched, they burn and hurt. Shingles can recur. Has your doctor tested for this? If this isn’t it, keep going to other doctors until you find one that can figure it out.

Hyapatia,
I heard that Kegel exercises for women strengthen vagina muscles. Isn't this basically just to make you tighter so it will feel better for the guy?
Dominique

Dear Dominique,
There are many more benefits than that! The stronger your Kegel muscle is, the stronger your orgasm! That's the most important one for me. Also, as we age and our bodies change, especially following childbirth, our muscles become weaker. The uterus can actually move down further into the vagina; gravity takes it's toll. Watch Dr. Oz or The Doctors – or look it up if you don't believe me. As we get older and after having kids, our muscle is often weak, so that when we sneeze, cough or laugh hard, a little pee comes out. Weak Kegel muscles are the cause. To avoid this and possible painful uterine prolapse and encourage good, strong orgasms, do those Kegel exercises!

Hyapatia,
My girlfriend says anal sex causes hemorrhoids. That’s why she says she won't try it. Is that true?
Sammy

Dear Sammy,
Not true. If you’re gentle and use lots of lube, it can actually be a good preventative. Ellen Barnard, a sex educator/counselor and co-founder of A Woman’s Touch in Madison, WI, says, “It improves the strength and flexibility of the skin and muscles so that the anus is better able to respond to pressure, rather than bulging and producing hemorrhoids.” So you see, I’m not just pulling this out of my ass!