Late last week, the editorial department at HIGH TIMES reached out to me and asked if I would be interested in conducting some important field research on the current state of the sexual stoner.

Now, while I wasn’t exactly sure what this study was going to entail, I was relatively certain that if it at least encompassed the two basic principles of the subject -- getting high and having sex -- than I would have absolutely no problem pushing aside everything I had planned for the weekend and jumping into the project, well, head first.

It wasn’t until after I agreed to take on the project that my editor informed me of the physically demanding details of the magazine’s latest stoner research: to discover at all costs the funniest and trickiest sexual positions to do while high.

Here are five that gave my lady and me just as many laughs as they did trouble:

Wheelbarrow
No two stoners alive can possibly get their rocks off by engaging in the type of sexual position where the age-old phrase “knocking boots” is virtually impossible. For those of you that have not yet attempted this boner stunt, the Wheelbarrow position is more about being reduced to a night of manual labor than it is about neck-biting lust. It’s awkward, and while I am certainly all about gawking at beautiful womans' cabooses, I am not the slightest bit interested in throwing my back out in the process.

However, for all of those residing in medical marijuana communities, a solid night of Wheelbarrow action just might wrench your back up bad enough for a doctor to write you a hefty script.

Bumper Cars
Perhaps this position is less humorous and maybe even more enjoyable under sober conditions; but toss in a fat sack of exceptional weed and it feels more like an audition for a cartoon sidekick than anything even closely resembling sex.

Seriously, even though throughout the entire ridiculous affair my face was buried in a sheet, I got the feeling this so called Bumper Car position is exactly what SpongeBob Squarepants and Patrick would look like while attempting to uncover the mystery behind how babies are made.

And we cannot disregard the fact that I almost had to call in a third party just to successfully get the two us into this godforsaken position. Truth is, I have never been stoned enough where having my north bound boner forced into a southbound position felt anywhere in the vicinity of good.

Swiss Miss
Any stoner that has ever chiefed it up with a beautiful girl on a warm summer nights before trying to slip her the old reefer rocket on the trampoline outside her parent’s house will certainly appreciate this ludicrous sexual position. That’s because to do this doobie deed, you are first required to bend your lovely lady over an extremely unstable yoga ball and then, balance.

It was rather comical to watch my lady trying to keep herself from rolling face first onto the carpet, but I got the feeling that if I let her hit the wall one more time, the party was going to be officially over.

Amazon
Admittedly, being stoned in this position felt just about as good as it gets; that is, until my lady, who apparently, was ready for a little revenge after being diddled belly down on a cold yoga ball, tried to pin my knees behind my ears.

Just seconds after feeling both of my knees graze my temporal lobe, everything went black. That is when the high-hilarity ensued, and soon we were forced to abort the Amazon position due to the fact that the two of us kept carrying on like a couple of 8-year-olds giggling at fart jokes on the playground.

Face Off
Warning -- this position is not recommend for the stoned couple suffering from the munchies in the sack. It is possible that you just might bite off more than you can chew, and unless you happen to have a snorkel and a set of handlebars somewhere close by, you could find yourself wearing your partners ass for a hat.

Remember kids, high or not, sometimes simplicity is best when it comes to slinging the stoned boner.

Mike Adams writes for Playboy's The Smoking Jacket, BroBible and Hustler Magazine. Follow him: @adamssoup; facebook.com/mikeadams73.