After 40 years, we at HIGH TIMES have learned something new about our readers: you stoners really love sex! In appreciation of everything high, horny and slightly demented, we recently sent our correspondent of High Humping, Mike Adams, back into the field in an attempt to compile the second installment of Stoned Boner.

Here are five more sexual positions to try high:

High Times: Taking Hits of Whisker Biscuit
Some might say that taking a couple of bong hits before attempting this cunnilingus trapeze act might be a little dangerous -- I say go for it. 

Kama Sutra named this carpet munchin’ circus act after HIGH TIMES, so my editors were adamant that I strap on the old female feedbag and try like hell not to throw my back out or sprain my tongue.

Not only does this position require the man to lift a woman’s naked body over his head and position her whisker biscuit parallel to his mouth, but it dictates she do the splits.

While I was able to use a wall to gain some additional balance and traction, I managed to scrape my wiener on a piece of wood paneling, which brought this superhero mustache ride to a screeching halt. 

Gateway Arch: Bend That Boner
Perhaps one of the most challenging positions for the sexual stoner is one where the couple is reduced to ass-bumping fornication on their tip toes. 

Not only does this position come with a high probability of leg cramps and a fractured skull, but it's almost impossible to act out without a highly trained stunt penis -- complete with a hard-on harness and vaginal airbags.

This position calls for an extremely flexible pecker, which is apparently another major character flaw in the wieners of stoner journalists. As we learned in the first installment of the Stoned Boner, a man’s package has some difficulty adjusting to nearly being shoved up his own bottom.

Viennese Oyster: Seafood Slam
For the stoned and discriminating boner with simple desires, this porno pose is suitable and easy. 

It's worth mentioning to any man who gets super stoned and loses himself in the sloppy sounds of ecstasy for extended periods of time, that this basic rough-housing stance has the capacity to quickly transform into a legless dimension of sexual terror. 

It’s like, one minute you are stoned and boning, the next minute you’re diddling a double amputee and wondering if you are, in fact, the first man in history to actually “fuck the legs off” of someone.

Buckled Blow Job: Get Your Joint Smoked
There is nothing like getting the old stoned boner gnawed on by an enthusiastic woman of the leaf, especially once you reach a level of intensity that her gag reflex is temporarily disabled. That is, unless the poor girl is forced into attempting this godforsaken position, which at first glance appears to have been developed during a porno parody of The Exorcist

Although the man’s involvement in this position is very simple: just lay flat on your hairy back and hump your woman's pie hole, the woman’s role is a bit more complex. She has to straddle, bend and suck without snapping her spine like a pretzel stick.

It should come as no surprise when I tell you I was met with some resistance after explaining the position to my lady. In fact, it took several red-faced hits from a stash of Hoosier homegrown before she would even entertain the idea of dishing out a backbend blowjob for the sake of the high sciences. In the end, we unanimously determined that acrobatics and stoners do not mix. 

Max Planck: A New Strain to the Groin or The Real Big Bang Theory
Any stoner that insists on incorporating this level of quantum physics into his sex life is obviously not high enough… or maybe they're too high! All I know is after explaining the position  to my lady, she threatened to call the cops. However, after showing her the freaky blueprint my editors sent over, she quickly calmed and said something to the effect of, “You think your winky is long enough to get it in from that position?”

Sadly, this brought our stoned boner session to an end.

Mike Adams writes for stoners and smut enthusiasts in HIGH TIMES, Playboy’s The Smoking Jacket and Hustler Magazine. You can follow him on Twitter @adamssoup and on Facebook/mikeadams73.