Members of the California Narcotic Officers’ Association, the largest law enforcement brainwash corporation in California, are upset with President Obama over his recent comments about marijuana being no more dangerous than alcohol. Now, this butt-hurt team of Narcs wants the president to retract his statements.

Just in case you have been living under a rock for the past month, or have been off the grid from smoking too much of that Ecuadorian Pow-Pow, President Obama recent gave a quasi-optimistic interview with The New Yorker, in which he stated, “I don’t think marijuana is more dangerous than alcohol.”

That sentence is all it took before law enforcement officials all across the nation began stomping around as though the president had come into their homes, porked their wives, and then took a gigantic dump on their front lawn.

So, late last month, California Narc president Steve Riddle decided to be the big brother for the law enforcement community by sending President Obama a letter, asking him to take back the positive remarks he made about marijuana. 

“Retract your comments on marijuana and alcohol. They are being misused by people with their own legalization agenda to somehow make the argument that the legal status of alcohol demands legalization of yet another addictive substance that will inevitably be commercialized and marketed to children.”

Perhaps thinking a quote by Nelson Mandela would be inspirational enough to convince the president that his comments were out-of-school and contentious, Riddle continues by writing, “We would suggest that you reevaluate your comparison of alcohol and marijuana, keeping in mind the words of the late South African President Nelson Mandela:

“‘We should never underestimate the dangers of the drug problem and the high price that it exacts from many countries, including our own. It is a serious threat not only to the moral and intellectual integrity of our nation and other nations. It is a serious threat to the health and well-being of our people.’”

However, Riddle fails to take into consideration one of Mandela’s most popular quotations: “Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world.” So, allow us to take you to school: There are 2.5 million alcohol related deaths every year across the globe, according to the National Council of Alcoholism and Drug Dependence. Marijuana kills none. Therefore, President Obama was right -- marijuana is, in fact, less dangerous than booze.

Nevertheless, the truth did not keep Riddle from condemning Obama for his evidence-based commentary. Instead, the Narc reaches for stoner stereotypes and pathetically uses the future well-being of president’s children in an attempt to solidify his pussyfoot.

“I would never condone or make reference to any substance that could diminish my children’s future success as being ‘less harmful,’” he writes. “Playing video games, eating junk food, and not exercising are ‘a bad idea, a waste of time, [and] not very healthy’. Using marijuana, or any other drugs for that matter, is simply dangerous. I am sure you would never open the door for your children to even think it is okay to use marijuana for any reason. Because of your honorable position as the leader of our great nation, you should hold the children of our nation to the same standard as your own children.”

Marijuana legalization is already a reality in two states, and with four marijuana legalization initiatives in California currently fighting to get on the November ballot, we suspect it will be legal for Narc Riddle and his children soon enough.

Mike Adams writes for stoners and smut enthusiasts in High Times, Playboy’s The Smoking Jacket and Hustler Magazine. You can follow him on Twitter @adamssoup and on Facebook/mikeadams73.