In an excruciating bid to keep the young pukes of future generations from succumbing to the lustful evils of marijuana addiction, Arizona lawmakers have emerged from their Republican fear cellar with a scheme to use fees derived from medical marijuana dispensaries to teach kids to stay off ganga.

Earlier this week, the House Health Committee approved legislation that would serve to collect fees, civil penalties and private donations, and deposit them into a fund aimed at deterring the continued degeneration of stoner society. That’s right -- rather than use accrued fines and other strong-arm taxes for say, anything fucking else, these one-dimensional cactus lappers have decided it is in the best interest of the state to spend millions of stagnant dollars “To discourage marijuana use among the general population.”

So far, the state has hoarded roughly $6 million since voters gave the proverbial thumbs up in 2010 for medical marijuana. Representative Ethan Orr, one of the men advocating for this caveman campaign, says the fund could generate in upwards of $2 million a year, which would be distributed to law enforcement agencies for “resource officers” and to lend support to additional programs that teach kids to “just say no” to the high life.

Mason Tvert, director of communications for the Marijuana Policy Project, the pro-pot organization responsible for financing Arizona’s 2010 initiative to legalize medical marijuana, believes using these funds to inspire fear in the eyes of the public is absurd.

“It is remarkable how much money some government officials are willing to flush down the toilet in hopes of scaring adults away from using marijuana,” said Tvert, adding that public campaigns paid for by the government should be factual.

“It's a fact that marijuana is less harmful than alcohol,” Tvert said. “If an adult would prefer to make the safer choice to use marijuana instead of using alcohol, they should have that right.”

Tvert, along with the majority of marijuana supporters, agrees that smoking pot and drinking booze are not extra-curricular activities that should be engaged in by the youth of America. However, unlike our opposing forces, we are not naive enough to think, not even for a second, that our precious children are dense enough to buy into the government’s feeble “high on life” crusades.

Hell, obviously “Generation X” did not buy into the government’s brand of Reefer Madness 30 years ago, when they attempted to teach us during Saturday morning cartoons that “users were losers” and to “take a bite out of crime.” -- that is the reason marijuana is currently being legalized in this country -- we never bought into the bullshit.

Yet, Orr believes that millions of dollars generated from the medical marijuana market should be allotted for anti-drug campaigns targeting the impressionable demographic of 24 and under; that such a move would be a viable investment for the future of society. Not likely.

There is speculation that Orr’s proposed amendment to use medical marijuana money to fund anti-pot campaigns is not even legal. Even if it is, he will have to convince three-fourths of the House and Senate that his revisions “further the purpose” of the original measure before it can be passed.

Mike Adams writes for stoners and smut enthusiasts in HIGH TIMES, Playboy’s The Smoking Jacket and Hustler Magazine. You can follow him on Twitter @adamssoup and on Facebook/mikeadams73.