We’ve heard horror stories of dealers passing off non-intoxicating substances to the unsuspecting citizen as marijuana, but even we must admit that not only does this particular toker’s tale really stink, but it has also left a bad taste in our mouth.
The whole affair began late last month in Nicaragua when la policía decided to shakedown a suspicious young man who they believed was holding a fat sack of weed. During a street search, officers discovered several plastic baggies in his pocket, which they believed to contain a significant amount of highly compressed South American maui-waui.
That is when la policía arrested the young man, tossed him in the back of a squad car, and took him on a high-speed journey about 80 miles north to a police station in Matagalpa, where they planned to charge him for possession of marijuana. The young man pleaded with the officers to take a closer whiff of the weed. He knew if they did, they would be able to smell that the marijuana was, in reality, a heaping mess of horse manure.
“Supposedly that stuff was marijuana, but it’s not marijuana,’ the gypped stoner told TN8-TV. “It seems it is horses***. Some man on the street robbed my money.”
Although the young man’s claim of being sold a load of stallion crap in place of marijuana sounded too bizarre, even for Nicaragua’s finest, laboratory tests of the substance did in fact confirm that a street dealer had made a horse’s ass out of them all.
The young man told la policía that he bought the dope because he was given a really good price. Yet, it was only after he took his first shit hit that he realized he had been scammed. “I’m not a dealer, I work on a coffee farm,’ said the young stoner. “I feel robbed. I was going to smoke a joint and get half-crazy on the bus, but instead what I got was a big horse t***.”
HIGH TIMES 101: When buying weed, be careful when asking for the “good shit.”
Mike Adams writes for stoners and smut enthusiasts in HIGH TIMES, Playboy’s The Smoking Jacket and Hustler Magazine. You can follow him on Twitter @adamssoup and on Facebook/mikeadams73.