Whoever is responsible for giving dogs the title of “man’s best friend” obviously did not have a cat that delivered free weed. But if they did, we certainly hope they maintained more loyalty than a New Zealand woman did over the weekend -- ratting out her cat to the cops for bringing her home a bag of pot.
Authorities in Halfway Bush said they received a call from a nervous woman on Sunday wanting to report that her feline friend had just delivered “a bag of drugs” to her front door. When police arrived, the woman was eager to show them exactly what her cat had dragged in -- a baggie containing several grams of meowjuana.
“It was approximately 5g of cannabis, which has a street value of between $100 and $150,” said Sergeant Reece Munro.
Apparently, the cat was oblivious to the fact that not only is his human extremely lame, but also a boldfaced nark. Sergeant Munro says the woman was ecstatic to have the marijuana that her bad kitty brought home removed from her property. ''You hear of cats bringing dead birds and rats home but certainly in my career I've never seen anything like this before,” said Munro. ''I guess you never really know who's keeping you honest these days, do you?''
Although the cat is not cooperating with authorities, Sergeant Munro says that his department is currently conducting a full-blown investigation in hopes of determining where the mystery bag of cannabis came from. ''We will continue our investigation and look at having the plastic bag fingerprinted,” he said.
Sergeant Munro says that while his department has been using dogs trained to detect marijuana for many years, there may be a possibility of using cannabis-sniffing cats in the near future. However, rumor has it that when Munro asked the kitty if he would be interested in joining the force one day, the cat replied, “What do I look like -- a pig?”
Now, that’s a good kitty!
Mike Adams writes for stoners and smut enthusiasts in HIGH TIMES, Playboy’s The Smoking Jacket and Hustler Magazine. You can follow him on Twitter @adamssoup and on Facebook/mikeadams73.