Okay so the Cannabis Cup is still rolling along and, of course, it's a blast. But, whatever, we're having fun back at the office too! Yeah, A lot of fun! Here's what happens to the rest of us left in New York while most of the HIGH TIMES staff is partying at one of our five Cannabis Cups

5. Roach Hunt: It’s kinda like an Easter egg hunt through the office but instead of ending up with a bunch of crappy pastel colored eggs, you accumulate enough pot to mellow out Robin Williams circa 1985.

4. Bring Your Pet To Work Day: Don’t have a pet? Bring someone else’s. You see, some of us think our roommates are holding out on us or have the distinct feeling our neighbors like to burn the green but aren’t generous with the invites. The idea here is to finely tune the animal’s olfactory senses so they can be used for sniffing out the weed. Once Fluffy Bottoms has the scent, we can mysteriously appear on the scene just in time to partake in the festivities. We’ll be the higher and no one will be the wiser…

3. Half-Delirious Imaginary Staff Meeting: Basically, at this point, we only have a vague recollection of what my coworkers looked like but I’ve done my best to fashion their likenesses out of papier-mâché made from old HIGH TIMES calendars and blunt wraps. Once these effigies are seated around the conference table, it’s just like old times – except I’m in charge and I’m assigning them all to make out.

2. Nap Time: This is a bit of a throwback. I pitched it to the two other staff members left behind and they actually thought it was a good idea. So we all brought in our juice box of choice, played with construction paper for a half hour and then sought out a quite corner of the office for a little shuteye. I was halfway to dreamland when I realized this was not unlike a typical Wednesday around here.

1. Dress Up Like A Pirate And Wander Around Port Authority Bus Terminal Telling Everyone I Run Into That I’m “Looking For Booty”: This works on several levels. First – oh crap. They’re back. If anyone asks, I was working the whole time.

We wish we could be there, but you actually can be there! Check out when our next Cup is happening and get in on the real fun.